Category Archives: Vivika’s Musings

What should have been.

Tonight’s blog should have been about fears, what shapes them and how they impact our daily lives. It was a carefully constructed article (If I do say so myself) that tackled the issues of childhood trauma and facing those fears. Then unfortunately WordPress happened. Thanks to a issue saving the article the whole thing was deleted. I’m not a huge tech whiz so there may be a small chance that it was my fault somehow but I’m trying to not cry so let’s just leave it at that.

Instead you may consider yourself having read a terrific article and are now thinking, “Wow! That’s probably the best thing I’ve ever read on the internet.” I’m trying to cheer myself up here if you will indulge a girl. Anyway, if you find my article zooming about cyber space feel free to nab it and prove me wrong.

This isn’t the greatest thing you’ll read on the internet but at least it’s a tribute 😉

In the meantime I’d like to continue on the theme of fear with a few words:

They sow doubt and plague our minds. 

Fears hold us back; routed deep in our design.

A time comes when we don’t have a choice.

They come at us full on with a screaming voice.

Then we decide to run or to fight.

Do we give in to that all consuming fright?

Face them for the sake of those who rely.

Face them or at least give it a try.

Enjoy this? Read more articles from Vivika Widow by clicking HERE 

Coming 2020

Bring my your sick. Bring me your troubled. Bring me those that society can no longer cope with, for they will always have a home here at Harbour House.

Click HERE to pre order.

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My Earliest Memory

I have a terrible memory at the best of times so why, you may ask, have I chosen to write about my earliest one? Just how far back can I go?

Despite having a shocking memory there are those moments that just stick. One such memory is of something that happened to me when I was about 5 years old. It’s probably not as far back as many of you can go and probably not technically my earliest memory but it certainly did stand out for me.

My mother had explained to me that she was going to visit an aunt. Letty her name was. I had never heard my mum mention this aunt before and I had certainly never met her. I was in and out of hospital a lot as a kid so I was familiar with all the hospitals in the area. The one I was taken to to see Letty wasn’t so much a hospital as a care home. It was private, beautiful with elaborate gardens. The lighting wasn’t as harsh as a hospital normally would be. The nurses weren’t wearing NHS uniforms. There was hospital beds though. That was when I was introduced to Letty. As I said I had never met this woman before in my life. Mum seemed to know her real well though. She was incredibly sick. She had an oxygen mask on and kept drifting in and out of sleep. Mum spoke to the carers but I watched Letty, comfortable, clean and surrounded by people.

Obviously mum had just made it her point to say hello to an old relative as she was easing away from life, perhaps not a relative at all but a friend of my grandmother. Either way having never met before I was taken to this strangely caring, friendly place. Now that I’m older I realise it was probably a hospice. The reason this particular memory stands out to me is because it was all so strange as a five year old. As a child you see things in black and white for the most part. I had never before witnessed death and age walk hand in hand with smiles and comfort.

We may have only just met that one time but Letty certainly had a huge impact on me. I could ask my mother exactly who she was and why she was there but sometimes it’s best to allow that little bit of mystery to remain. I sincerely hope that little girl clutching a grey rabbit brought some comfort to you Letty. I do remember it made you smile.

What about you? What was your earliest memory?

Enjoy this? Read more articles from Vivika Widow by clicking HERE 

Coming 2020

Bring my your sick. Bring me your troubled. Bring me those that society can no longer cope with, for they will always have a home here at Harbour House.

Click HERE to pre order.

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Character Profile: Brendan Mack

Age: 57

Occupation: Owner of MACK DISTILLERY

Features in: KNOCK KNOCK ; HARBOUR HOUSE

Brendan is the head of the Mack clan and owner of Shady City’s finest whiskey distillery. His family brand has been enjoyed for generations and it is a dynasty that aims to carry on for years to come. Suppliers of the KNOCK KNOCK CLUB. An arrangement that was made with his good friend TAWNY MCINNEY aka the Baroness.

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Reporter, Sam, enjoys a glass of Macks as he contemplates what he has gotten himself into coming to the Knock Knock club.

Brendan is no stranger to trouble nor is he shy of it. Confined to a wheel chair he won’t let that hold him back. He was there the night the Knock Knock club was burnt out in an attack. He will always be there for his friends and even such violence won’t frighten him away.

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Macks bring the booze. The Knock Knock club bring the talent.

He’s a native of the town of BELLFIELD, a small suburb just outside the city. His brand sponsors the football team and provided the stadium MACK and Sons arena. Located on Love Street – an area with huge cultural significance to those from Bellfield.

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Son Paddy shows pride in the team.

Father of four boys Kieran, PADDY, Aiden and Alfie and one daughter Siobhan the Macks are a tight family group. They may be uncivilised to some but no one can’t fault their loyalty. It is a trait that Brendan encourages in his children and his workers/. As the man says, “if people can’t count on ya then yer no feckin’ good for anything.”

Complete season 1 of the Knock Knock graphic novel series is free to read HERE.

Or click HERE to download for Kindle.

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Coming 2020.

Bring me your sick. Bring me your troubled. Bring me those that society can no longer cope with. They will always have a home here at HARBOUR HOUSE.

 

Depression: An Unspoken Problem

Awareness of depression is on the rise. You only have to open up social media and you’ll find hundreds of mental health advocates. Since awareness is on the rise it is being recognised more and thankfully we can open up the conversation about it. But there are still parts of the illness that people don’t seem to consider or at least they don’t talk about it as much. Consider for a moment the toll it takes on those who love the sufferer.

There is of course plenty of useful advice on how to care for a sufferer of depression and how to help them through it. Helpguide.org suggest being a compassionate listener. It also suggests encouraging the sufferer to seek help but what it doesn’t do is address just how mentally and emotionally exhausting it can be to watch someone  you love battle depression. I’m not for a minute belittling the experience of the sufferer but I do feel the experience of those closest to them isn’t taken into account as much as it should. It is indeed a battle they are fighting – be it a parent, sibling, friend or lover – and it is a battle you cannot join them in no matter how much you would like to. True clinical depression is such that there is nothing you can say or do that will cheer them up. It is more than feeling a little melancholy. It is incredibly painful to see them stuck in their misery like a prison when all you can do is encourage them to seek help. I am so glad that there is more help springing up daily because with the fast pace of the modern world and an increasing detachment from from the human touch means it is needed more than ever. It means suggested a depressed loved one seeks help is getting easier to do.

What happens when it becomes even more severe? I those reading this have never had someone you love tell you that the can’t see any future for themselves and they want to take their own life. Suicide is a very real risk for depression sufferers but losing someone close to it, knowing there was nothing all of your love and support couldn’t pull them back? A sentence in it’s own way.

Helpguide.org suggests like airline staff advise ‘put on your own oxygen mask before helping others’. You can’t be available 24/7 and giving all of yourself will only make your own mental health suffer.

You want to help. You want to pull them through but sometimes you’re only left with platitudes like, “look on the bright side,” or “we all get a little depressed sometimes.” These are no good, probably more harmful really, but when a loved one is on the edge of life and seeing nothing but darkness you’ll try anything.

There will be support out there for carers. There certainly is advice on how to handle it. Truthfully I have only just begun to scratch the surface but I thought it may be helpful to some out there to open up the discussion. Whether we care to admit it or not taking care of someone close through depression is frustrating and it can make you angry with them. You know they can’t help it but you have your own emotional responses to deal with.

Rather than get angry, make yourself sick with worry or worse give up on them I would like to see more support for depression carers. Depression – as difficult as it is – doesn’t just affect the sufferer alone.

If you are affected by the issues in this article visit:

https://www.helpguide.org/home-pages/depression.htm

Vivika tackles the issues of depression and suicide in her award winning short story THE GRIP. Click HERE to read.

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Welcome to Harbour House

A unique rehabilitation clinic in the Chamberlain Docks area of Coldford. It is also the next stop on our Shady City journey. Coming 2020 check in to Harbour House for some recovery and gain a unique perspective on life in Coldford.

As chief clinician, eminent doctor Gregory WINSLOW, says, “bring me your sick. Bring me your troubled. Bring me those society can no longer cope with. They will always have a home here.”

Three of the residents you have met before but we’ll begin introductions with a trauma sufferer with a big reputation. A lovable trouble maker and owner of the hottest club in the Shady City. MISS MCINNEY, welcome to Harbour House.

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Resident 0109: Tawny McInney. TRAUMA.

Not ready to move on yet? Complete season 1 of the Knock Knock graphic novel series is free to read HERE.

Or click HERE to download for Kindle.

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Case Closed

Verdict is in. Sentence has been given. The Knock Knock club is closed pending further investigation.

That’s not all she wrote folks. That is only just the beginnings. The Knock Knock club attracted the filth of the city and finding them in one place makes it easier to put them behind bars.

Volume 2 promised the Hammer of justice would fall hard and it did. What to expect from a Volume 3? Keep your eyes peeled and secure your socks.

We have an exciting announcement coming tomorrow 6pm (UKST) so we look forward to hearing your thoughts.

Drop your comments and reactions from Season 1 and let’s keep the magic alive. 😏

Complete season 1 of the Knock Knock graphic novel series is free to read HERE.

Or click HERE to download for Kindle.

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Taking Note

 I thought it was when I first crossed the threshold of the KNOCK KNOCK club that my life changed forever. The truth was it happened the moment I arrived in the Shady City.

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Welcome to Coldford AKA the Shady City.

“You’ll find some dark stories in Coldford,” my dad told me before I left the sleepy little suburb of JAMESTOWN.

It did have a reputation but then most big cities do.

MADELINE, my fellow reporter was the first person I met. She was friendly, intelligent and had the ravenous, wild ambition most reporters do. What happened to her is something I still can’t bear to write down. Seeing my name associated with the city’s largest newspaper blinded me. Being a journalist was all I ever wanted. I guess I had that ravenous hunger for a story too and it led to people close to me getting hurt.

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Reporters Sam and Madeline discuss recent events at the offices of Coldford Daily.

There were whispers of the Knock Knock cabaret club being connected to the disappearance of the mayor. Having exhausted all other avenues and an invitation conveniently landing in my hands it was my next port of call.

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Access to the Knock Knock club is by invitation only.

I met a woman there. She had coldness in her eyes that told me she was going to be trouble. She was foul, vicious and knew more about what had happened to the mayor than she would tell. I couldn’t draw myself away from her. The story lay with her and the mayor was only just the beginning.  You see, the Shady City was a dangerous place as my dad had warned and those dangers spilled out of the Knock Knock club but the real threat was far greater than anything I had anticipated.

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Tabitha – Boss Lady of the Knock Knock Club.

Tragedy, jeopardy and deceit were all thrown as obstacles in my way. The story was too great. No matter the consequences to me it had to be told.

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Sam is shocked by some of the reveals his story on the Knock Knock club brings.

Luckily I had friends along the way to help. Without them I would have been lost.

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Supporting and protecting Sam as he navigates his way through the City. Lydia has a reasons of her own to pursue.

What nights at the Knock Knock club taught me was that the true problem the city faces is much grander than sequins, feathers, booze and blood. Judgement is set to fall and the hammer of justice will crush anyone underneath it, even a BOSS LADY who would seem to have the world at her feet.

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Her Honour Judge Karyn Doyle.

When the villains of the Shady City are all locked behind bars and the doors are closed on the origins of that villainy where will it leave the rest of us? What happens next? Well, that is where the true story lies.

Well folks that was a sum up from our Sam. Keep your eyes peeled for more from the Knock Knock club. In the meantime:

Complete season 1 of the Knock Knock graphic novel series is free to read HERE.

Or click HERE to download for Kindle.

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Check your Troubles at the Door

We may have come to the end of S1 but wait … there’s more 😏

We are bringing you not just one hot new volume but 2 🙌

Yes that’s right folks. We are confirmed for season 2 (vol 3 and 4)

To celebrate here’s what the Knock Knock club has to say about being the hottest spot in town …

Complete season 1 is free to read HERE.

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Character Profile: Theresa Crusow

Name: Theresa Crusow

Age: 35

Occupation: Housewife

Features in: KNOCK KNOCK

Wife of reporter, SAM CRUSOW, Theresa had also been studying journalism at City College when she met her husband to be and their friend MADELINE LOWER. After the first year she left, deciding she didn’t wish to pursue one of Coldford’s most dangerous professions. Instead she stayed at home where the danger gathered around her, waiting on the call to tell her her husband had asked questions of the wrong person or knocked on the wrong door.

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But Theresa is more than just a reporter’s wife. She has secrets of her own. However, whilst Sam is Hell bent on chasing a story on the KNOCK KNOCK CLUB and how it connects to the disappearance of Mayor Feltz. Whilst his focus is stolen he fails to see what is happening closer to home.

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Theresa is high maintenance, a little self absorbed and easily swayed by con men and vagabonds. You could say she is easy prey in the Shady City and whilst her husband’s attention is drawn elsewhere the vultures will circle.

Enjoy this?

Theresa’s dirty little secrets are being aired by the Knock Knock Club.

Complete season 1 of the Knock Knock graphic novel series is free to read HERE.

Or click HERE to download for Kindle.

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Served Cold

The Knock Knock club closed almost as quickly as it reopened. With the Boss Lady behind bars and the power house that is the Penn Auction House silenced where does that leave the Shady City?

Find out as the story continues with issue 14: Laying down the Law. Available on Kindle tomorrow and free to read here on Widow Web Monday from 6pm (UKST).

Yeah we know Buddy, we’re excited too! 😏

Tension is building. Speaking of which we’ve went ahead and made an appointment for you with the ominous Judge Doyle. Don’t be late!

We got chills, we got thrills and we got girls who can ease any ills. You’re all welcome to the Knock Knock club for the best entertainment in the Shady City while it lasts because that shit is being shut down faster than we can say Boss Lady.

Please note the Knock Knock club holds no responsibility for any legal tangles you may find yourself in as a result of a good time.

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Episodes 1 – 13 of the hit graphic novel series is free to read HERE on Vivika Widow Online or you can download for kindle by clicking HERE.

KNOCK, KNOCK: Episode 1: Welcome to the Club

Knock, Knock: Episode 2: Don’t Come Knockin’

Knock, Knock: Episode 3: Sleep Tight Sam

Knock, Knock: Episode 4: Take A Bow

Knock, Knock: Episode 5: A Room With A View

Knock, Knock: Episode 6: Picking Up Strange Women

Knock, Knock: Episode 7: No Kids Allowed

Knock, Knock: Episode 8: Kids These Days

Knock, Knock: Episode 9: Shootin’ The Breeze

Knock, Knock: Episode 10: Calling Last Orders

Knock Knock: Episode 11: Shady City Blues

Knock Knock: Episode 12: Going Down

Knock Knock: Episode 13: Got the Fever